Sunday, February 22, 2009

I hope Coke stock goes up.



In my home I've added an 11th commandment; Thou shalt not drink soda pop. Oh and I've made it a very well known tid bit, especially around the in-laws house. Just to preface...rumor has it that back in the day Coke wasn't doing so well. Husbands Grandpa was so nervous that they may go out of business so he bought a bunch of stock in hopes to keep the company alive. Well fast forward 60 years and the in-laws are still keeping the company up and running. Instead of water or any other beverage they drink Coke, I mean they practically bathe in the stuff. We constantly banter back and forth about our polar opposite in the dietary belief system. To them I am an extreme tree hugging bark eating daughter in-law and to me they are the biggest meat eating toxin drinking in-laws. Now it's a good thing all parties have such good senses of humor.

On past visits when Grandma has come to town she hides her Coke in the fridge. When she takes it out to have a sip, she tries to hide her addiction from the kids. She may have even asked for a brown paper bag to put it in while she drinks it but I'm not sure if I just made that one up. I think she thinks she is really funny. Well Grandma's back in town and something has gotten into her crazy bones because she brought the Coke out for all to see as she proudly slurped it down. My worst nightmare started unfolding before my eyes as Little "M" asked for a drink of it tonight. The tension got a little thick as all eyes were on the grandma/granddaughter duo. We all watched closely as Grandma proceeded to tell Little "M" that it didn't taste very good. Little M's response was "Oh, well my Daddy drinks it all the time", followed by a few random snickers heard throughout the kitchen. Let's not talk about the fact that the stuff Daddy drinks is shall we say all yellow, which may deem him as a traitor considering the only all yellow beverage I know about belongs to the Pepsi family and he would be at risk of being disowned. We don't want that to happen because there is still stock involved here if you know what I mean. Anyway little "M" wasn't going to let the topic go. She wanted to know why it was so bad for you. All Grandma could come up with was, "It makes your teeth fall out". Little M's eyes got all wide as she moved in closer to inspect Grandma's teeth. She said something to the extent that you shouldn't drink it then Grandma because that's not good if your teeth fall out. Grandma's response was "It's ok to drink it when your old cause your teeth just fall out anyway." Little "M" finally was satisfied after Grandma let her just smell it.(refer to above picture) 

Good one Grandma...I'll just make up for it and cook you garlic infused tofu every night for the rest of your stay.

Then there's this picture..


We love Grandma. She always comes bearing gifts. This time she thought she could make Little "M" so happy by bringing the Barbie that she had left at her house last time when we were there. Did I mention that Grandma thought she was doing Little "M" a favor by using Gorilla glue to keep Barbies shoes and dress on? It almost sent little "M" over the edge with the thought of not being able to remove Barbie's clothes. I guess Grandma didn't realize that we run a Barbie nudest colony over here. I finally got so sick of telling little "M" to keep the clothes on her Barbie that it was either send Barbie on a get away trip (which sounded like th best option because I didn't give Barbie to the girls anyway) or just ignore it. I chose the latter but wondered if it were the right decision after Baby #2 who hardly speaks a word of English picked Barbie up the other day and said, "baby nakey". Ooops, I'm just glad Baby #2 thinks Barbie is a baby.

What Grandma glues clothes and shoes on a Barbie anyway?

I guess this beautiful most loving one, who I have to admit that if drinking Coke everyday makes her look this good, then pour me a cold one.



13 comments:

Tiffany said...

hmmm... I seem to recall having a nice cold one with a certain mother of 5 under 5 :) I think the exact words were "route 44 DC with the sticker" does that ring a bell?? :) Am I going to have to fly there and bring you some of the addiction juice and some yummy chocolate Easter eggs or something ... what has happened to you!? I must admit I have cut WAY back but it's still nice once in a while... and my kids love it! :( I tried to keep them away (I was SO good with Brooklyn) but there's just no use. So far, it's not going in the sippy but I'll keep you posted.

Liza said...

I LOVE Pat! She's the best! How fun to be having her visit.

Full House said...

Tiff...shhhh, don't tell my mother in-law that though. I know I've changed my ways a bit in that department but one thing remains the same and that's my ability to dramatize a bit:-)

They sure do use the good kind of ice in the Route 44s though I do have to admit.

Kami Milliron said...

I am a Wild Cherry Pepsi Girl. Sorry Fancy Vancie, you aren't going to be able to break me of that one ! But I don't share it with Douglas - I am not that nice ; )

Debbie said...

That post was too funny. Pat is great! I'll bet Maile was so happy to have her barbie back. Remind me to tell you about the "barbie" incident when the girls had their sleep over. Little M loves barbies!!!

Whitney said...

HA HA You crack me up! This post was hilarious. I hope Grandmas efforts to not let little M have coke because her teeth will fall out stick.

Stacey Crewse said...

Hilarious!!! I had no idea you were anti-soda kind of girl! Well I'm glad we can still hang, even though I'm a big DP or should I say huge DP kind of girl. But no soda for my baby dolls any day of the week! Nuff said!

Laura said...

I found your blog through Swish and Swanky. The huge framed chalkboard post was gorgeous and genious. Great idea! Thanks for posting it! If I had a place to put it, I'd be hunting down a frame like you found for the project. :-)

Jami said...

oh I wish I had the will power to resist the sweetness of wild cherry pepsi, diet coke, diet coke with lime! OH, I just love them all so much. I have given them up mostly...but sometimes life throws a fast ball and you just need to sit back and drink a wild cherry pepsi!
I also can't help but let Grace take drinks. Spencer is good and wont let her...but I just can't stand to listen to her cry. I am such a baby

☂niki. said...

so cute! so funny. she really is beautiful.

sue said...

The gluing the Barbie clothes on thing? SO funny!! I swear that is the kind of thing my mother in law would do.-- If she had any idea there were such thing as gorilla glue.

Annie said...

Wow, Pat is one of a kind. Gluing the clothes on Barbie is evident that she was never a mother of girls ehh?!!! Dressing and undressing the Barbies is the fun of even having dolls. Bless her heart. She had all good intentions.
Way to stay strong on the soda thing. It's funny, I don't think any of us Vances drink sodas. It must be because we never had soda in the house. Now I can't stand colas or any carbonated drinks. Too artificial and makes me sick. It's funny how the rest of the world can't seem to live without them. I feel so liberated! :)

Raskills said...

This is such a funny post! I don't know you, but I read your cute sister's blog, Annie. You seem like you have such an amazing family!

Anyway, I'm happy to see you are a "nutrition obsessed Mama" too! :) We are actually mostly vegan and I've gotten rid of all processed sugar/flours from the house... we try to stick to whole grains, nuts, seeds, veggies, fruits... It's great. :)

Anyway, your children are adorable and oh my are you creative. Love your blog! Keep it up!

(I live in the Palo Alto area - are you in Northern California too?)

-Liz MacAskill
raskillfarm.wordpress.com